a ________ is in order

Before this becomes another discarded draft...

You, dear reader,  have been very nice to me. I have withdrawn myself for the most part from this blog. There are a few reasons why, some being that I have found myself frightened of what sharing my thoughts and feelings online could do to my future self's self-confidence (although I cherish the things that I post on here more than most things because it is a clear documentation of pieces and parts of my life) and also that I have felt a bit lack-luster about the things I have been producing in my life, whether that be photography or words or any other manner of foolish and trivial things that I put on here.

I think my overwhelming feeling, though, has been that I don't know what to say.

And it's not because nothing is happening. If anything, the lack of posting could be blamed on the fact that so much is happening. They aren't necessarily tangible, documentable things, though.

I turned twenty-two at the beginning of the month. That day helped me to reflect on the good things in my life and that  I am very fortunate to be doing all the things that I'm doing. I am going to school studying things that challenge me, but excite me, I'm photographing work that feels good and is sharpening my skills, I'm spending time with good friends who enrich my life and make me a better person.

Things are good. Things are happy.

So that's it. I'm confused. I'm elated. I'm melancholy. I'm thrilled. I'm hopeless. I'm optimistic. I'm stressed. But all that leads to this, my greatest conclusion: I am happy.

I'll tell you more about it soon.



kylee said...

if i could sign my name to your words i would, i feel like you just opened my chest and wrote everything you saw in my heart. thank you for posting, for sharing, and for showing me i'm not alone in my thoughts & feelings.

Kelli Anderson said...

same with me. can i cut and copy this into a post of my own? all that matters is that you're happy. and i guess i should say the same to myself.

Brissa said...

ditto to kylee and kelli. ditto. it's comforting to know that we are not alone in these feelings. in that lack-luster state of living and not knowing what to say. but things are good and life is happening and we are happy.
anna, thank you for sharing this piece of your soul.